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Saturday 14 July 2018

A FULL LIFE (What does it really mean to you about)

What is a good life? Do you have a personal definition, a concept or idea of what your good life means? As you run around, work hard, dream, plan and make sacrifices daily, at what point exactly would you say you’ve apprehended whatever it is you’re chasing? Do you know exactly what it is you’re chasing?

It is possible some of us aren’t chasing anything in life but mere survival. Our daily effort is towards the ability to pay all our bills and secure social relevance. We want to align with our contemporaries. When our mates buy cars, we buy too, when they dress well we dress as well, when they send their kids to good schools, we do the same school, when they build their houses we follow suit and build ours just like it too, when they are spending good money, we ensure we’re not left out and try to match them. All out hope and desire is to ensure we are not embarrassed or relegated in social rating. Our approach to life is that ambition to catch up and meet up.

There are some other people whose lives are driven by the desire to intimidate and oppress others. The primary motive for all they do is prove they are superior or better than their contemporaries. They assume the role of the trend setter – they make choices and activate plans purely to impress or oppress others. They are excellent at showing off their wealth, achievements and successes; simply to make other people jealous, envious;   inferior or feel like failures.

My dear friend, of which of these two are you? Are you playing catch up in life or you’re the oppressor? Any which one, I’m afraid you’re perhaps living a life derailed from purpose and empty in essence. It is not a truly happy life.

The inability to define who you are, what you want, where you’re going, what you want to become and the impact you want to make in this world will downgrade your very valuable life to that of catching up or oppressing others.

A good quality life has a meaning, a purpose, an essence, a sense of direction and timelines for great achievements. A good quality life is properly managed having no regard for vile competition or inferiority complex.                                                                                                                                                     

When you decide to build a good life for yourself, when you have a mental picture of your eventual self in the future, your daily choices and decisions will not be manipulated or influence by what others are thinking, doing or not doing. Your plans and strategy would be tailor made to suit your nature, your passion, your interest and things that really make you happy.

A few associates have challenged me and judged my lifestyle as boring and uninteresting simply because I don’t fit their own picture of a life of fun. Partying frequently, hanging out at night, drinking and having plenty friends is not me. Its repugnant to my nature, I’m not wired that way so the fact I don’t do all these doesn’t mean I’m not enjoying my life. I live my life for myself not to impress anyone, this decision has brought me so much peace and rest; I’m living the life suitable for my nature.

In this zone, creativity, deep thinking, clarity of mind, inner strength and the power to perform is easier. My locus of control is within me, not external hence, the mental and psychological fatigue that comes with living to impress or oppress or catch up is far removed from me, hence my productivity and progress is at optimum gauge.

Ladies and gentlemen, I assure you, your life can be more peaceful, restful and fulfilling than you can ever think or imagine. The ability to pull back and redesign your life for meaning will launch you to a realm you probably never knew existed in this life.

The pressure that comes from resisting intimidation and oppression from the society will vanish when you embrace your life of independence.

Too many of us today spend so much time complaining about how unfair life is and how unfair other people are to us. We become so angry at life and others it becomes impossible to keep at playing our own game in life and winning.

We are distracted by decisions, policies, developments, and some people we think are the reasons for our failures, stagnation and non-achievement.  Our minds are daily filled with thoughts about these problems and these people, our hearts are also filled with resentment and hate for the people we think are the cause of our pains and failures in life.

Ladies and gentlemen, a mind fixated on problems and difficulties, and a heart filled with resentment and hate cannot achieve anything phenomenal in this life.

Life can treat you anyhow, people can treat you as they please, but you are absolutely responsible for your own reaction to these treatments.

Listen to me my dear friends, life has never been fair to anyone; even those you believe are your oppressors are victims of life’s cruelty sometimes. You can’t wish life to be as you like, you must accept life as it is and keep progressing no matter what it brings.

Putting your life on hold and directing your whole energy towards fighting an unfair world is not wise. You can never win against life simply because your time here is limited, you are here for a season, life was here before you and life will continue after you with its unfair nature.

Wisdom, my dear friend, is making your own time count. You need to focus on your own life and make a miracle and a wonder out of your time of sojourn on earth.

Spending so much of your time fighting and focusing on what you can’t control at the expense of what you can control will make your own life unfruitful.

As we advocate and intensify pressure for good infrastructure, better policies, superior leadership and good governance in Nigeria, please don’t let go of your own personal life. It is possible to have a better Nigeria without a better you and it is very much possible to have a better you even if Nigeria keeps struggling.

Get a grip on your life, focus on all you can control and deal well with them. Take that seal off your limited thinking and do all you have to do. Stretch yourself, challenge yourself, do the needful! Enough of excess pleasure, excess playing, excess excuses; dear friend your time is running out.

It is time to live a full life. I’ve heard too many advocacies about making sacrifices today for a better tomorrow and I’ve heard people say also they will choose to enjoy their lives today as no one knows tomorrow. I personally don’t subscribe to these two ideologies.

I do not want to make any sacrifice for tomorrow if I can afford not to, and I don’t want to sacrifice my tomorrow to enjoy today because I don’t want to suffer at old age. I have therefore decided to live a full life.

A full life is that decision to enjoy every moment of your life and every season in your life. I have decided to enjoy every bit of my today and every bit of my tomorrow.

I want to eat what I want, wear what I like, drive the car I like, live in the neighbourhood I want, travel to any country I want and spend on all I like today and still be able to afford all the comfort, all the riches and all the security I need socially and financially at old age. I want to definitely pass on good inheritance to my children’s children.

This decision has changed the way I think, work, interact and live my life. It takes a certain kind of lifestyle – hard work, brainwork, smart connections, right associations, healthy friendships and know-how to live a very comfortable and fun life today and sustain it all lifelong. That for me, is living a full life.

Ladies and gentlemen, it is time you focus on your time, season and duration on earth and make it count. Stop dwelling and worrying about things you can’t control. Take proper charge and control of the things you can control and control them well to your advantage. Study the dynamics of the things you can’t control and take advantage of the waves – look for the favourable tides within life’s dynamics and exploit them positively.

There are some clothes you can’t wear at old age, there are some food you can’t eat at old age; there are some travels that’ll become too stressful at old age and some kind of fun you can’t afford at old age. Dear friend, enjoy your life now and enjoy your life when you’re old. Make up your mind today to live a full life. Work hard, learn what you need to learn, become friends with people that’ll help and inspire you, adopt new and productive habits, repackage your life for good success and reinvent yourself. Dear friend, live a full life.

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